"Hey Laserlips- Your Mother was a Snowblower!"

Oh c'mon, Short Circuit anyone? Johnny 5 is alive?? Well, on with it then:

Somehow I always pick to shovel my driveway at the EXACT time as my neighbor, I do not know how this happens. WELL. He has a giant fancy snowblower. During our previous snowy encounter, these were his words: "They've gotcha working hard I see, that seems like it would hurt your back!" Thanks, genius. This brings us to today...

I'm freezing hard and shoveling my butt off (switch that, or don't) and this neighbor brings his machine part-way into our gutter. I think great, with one swoop he can get all the slush from the gutter that is so heavy! Well he pushes the machine halfway across and then yells, over the noise, "why aren't you using a snowblower?" A couple of excuses sprung to mind, along the lines of "I like the exercise", "hard labor is a good change", and "shovels make more effective projectile weapons" but I just smiled and shrugged. (Obviously in one of my more clever moods) Refusing to let it go, he shouts again "I know he (my dad) has one- I gave it to him!" In truth, I'm not sure this snowblower has ever been operational. I made up a quick lie about not knowing how to use it and watched my neighbor move on (without blowing out the rest of the slush even though it would've taken 6.7 seconds but I'm not bitter about it).

I really loathe snowblowers. I also maintain the right to take that statement back with little to no guilt if I ever have a driveway of my own in a snowy place. In more entertaining news, I was actually quite enjoying myself while shoveling, thanks to my iPod. Though, at one point an older couple was walking by, taking a little snow-day walk I suppose (awww) and I’m busting out the words to "I Believe in a Thing Called Love" by The Darkness. They looked a little shocked and, well, I guess this story is funnier if you know the lyrics. Whatever, they’re probably out there somewhere blogging about the so-cool girl shoveling her driveway and singing this morning. "She was a delightful--and talented--young lady", they’ll say. It’s okay, the world is my fantasy world.